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I know one husband who when he’s feeling conjugal actually touches his wife as though he cherishes her character. As you’re heading out the door, give her upper arm a quick, affectionate double squeeze. One of the best things about women is that they really appreciate the smallest sign that you’re trying. Ask yourself, If I were a psycho neat freak, what would bother me in here?

secrets of dating younger women don-29

If you already have the book, thank you thank you thank you and please tell a friend.

In the meantime, here are the preliminary results of the survey.

In the beginning I was still hung up on Bad Boy, but distraction and detox (no contact with Bad Boy) really worked. Some of you were kind enough to answer my 60-second survey question: What is the single biggest challenge you’re dealing with in dating and relationships these days?

When Bad Boy reached out to me 16 months later, the addiction was genuinely dead, and I could authentically say f*** off. A’s excellent advice, detox from your Bad Boy, and if you can, find something or someone that can pull you forward into the present or the future — rather than some wistful past that you’ve idealized. If you wanted to answer but didn’t get around to it, you can do it now here.

When you and Lucy argue, don’t use either of these two words. But, more important, they’re gas-on-the-fire words. Instead of these indicting adverbs, use ameliorative words and phrases, like “sometimes or I feel” or “I wish.” Darn right they’re soft, but guess what?

The best husbands actually are a skosh more sensitive to their wives’ feelings than your average brute of a mate is. And remember: healthy communication is a bedrock of the best relationships.

No longer afraid of being alone, they talk things through.

In pursuit of something richer than mere amity, they explore regrets, grievances.

And for more great relationship tips, here are Fifteen Ways to Impress Any Woman. Softness and kindness and tenderness and all those traits that ain’t much use in the marketplace are pure gold when it comes to being a husband. This is the fundamental impenetrable puzzle of love. But great husbands have this reality in mind at all times.

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